Confindence.

Do you know what it feels like ... When you have no confindence? When people ask you, what is the most beautiful thing about you? You and I say: I don't know, I don't like me! But when they ask you, what is the most beautiful thing about your friend? You can say what's beautiful about her. I'm not the only girl in the world who feel this way. There are tons of girls that have zero confidence. Don't feel good about their selves. Become depressed.

As of right now. I have given up on this battle. With me, this has been going on for years now. And I'm sick of it. Sick of everything. I just ...  I just give up. And you know. I didn't became this way just for fun. No. People made me this way. People who bullied me. People who called me names. Why can't they just understand me? I'm one of the people who doesn't show their feelings. Even when I'm sad. I pretend I'm happy. Why? I don't really know. Their is only person on this earth who knows about my feelings and that person is my best friend. She knows everything about me.

I don't know why everything feel so heavy. I'm sick of this. I need to get out of this. I need to lose weight. I wanna have a normal body type. I wanna feel happy.I wanna enjoy my life without being fat. Being fat has haunted me for more than half of my life. But no, not anymore. Not anymore.

Busy, Tired, Unbroken and Just being random today.

Hey my lovely dolls!  How are y'all doing? Let me know in a comment, i'm always here to listen hihi! Anyhow I have not been treating my blog right. I know, I know these days I'm like becoming a personal blogger or something. Hmm, that doesn't sound bad now, does it? Don't worry my heart still lies with make-up! Always have been though. Since I've been little hihi. I remember people always saying to me, you look nice, you're such a doll(literally though). I was a fat kid, and still am though.

Well I've been busy as always. Like there is school, work. I've been working my ass off, just to buy an iPad. Yes, I have to work for my money. I mean how awesome would it be if I could just run to the store an buy one. But no, I have to wait another two weeks. Cause I'll get paid then *wink wink*. Like seriously, while I'm writing this my phone has been vibrating like crazy. Like I set my phone to vibrate if I get an new mail, and it's been like crazy these few minutes. Oh well. What was I talking about? Oh yeah, school, work and all that boring stuff. I've been really busy, but somehow my life is quite boring though. Hmmmm ... Notice the fact, that I literally wrote what I was thinking at that moment. LOL.

I've been really, really tired though. I still have to get used to the school routine. Which is crazy by the way. Plus my work has been really bugging me, calling me if can work. I mean, I have a life too. I don't go clubbing, just cause I hate it. It's fucking annoying, people getting drunk, doing crazy shit. I don't like that. You can have just as much fun as when your not drunk(i think). So you know, I need to do some socializing too(lol). Anyhow.

OMG,OMG,OMG did you guys hear Demi Lovato's new album, Unbroken? That album is just pure amazingness. And yes, I'm a lovatic. Hollaarr! When I say amazing, I ain't kidding. I just can't stop listening. Like right now, I'm listening to it. This album is freaking worth buying. My favourite songs are: well every song haha! No, but when I heard Lightweight. Wauw my heart just connected. You can hear the pain in her voice. And you know, Demi herself struggled with the fact that she was bullied and people calling her fat. It caused anorexia, cutting, depression. And then there the people that over eat. Like me for example. I'm overweight, and I need to lose weight. But it's not that easy as it seems. Anyhow.

Let's cut if off right there.

MAC Technique. Learn how to contour!

Hi dolls! Just got an exciting email! The dutchies already know about this, but MAC is giving some make up lessons! It's MAC technique. Where you learn how to contour your face and all that stuff!

Prices are €50, it might seem a lot. But afterwords you can pick out MAC stuff worth €50! So dutchies, grab your chance! And if you just might be in the Netherlands, you can also participate! See the pic for more info!

Blogging on the go? And just random blabbering.

Hi dolls! Okay. So did you see it? The new blogger app for iOS? Well I did. And I think this freaking awesome. Like now I can edit my posts from my phone. Which is a huge plus for me. Cause you know I'm not behind my computer all the time. I have school. I have to work you now. And this app really makes my life easier. Honestly. Because as I'm typing this. I'm just sitting here on my couch. Being lazy. Cause you know. It's Sunday. Sunday is lazy day for me. I love this. I can blog from anywhere I want to. Hell yeah. Wordpress already had a app. That's why mainly I was thinking about switching to wordpress. But now I won't. Cause of this app hell yeah.


Anyway. So now I have no excuses not posting a blog everyday haha! Expect more posts from now on!

Red lips ... Kardashian Addiction? Or a fall trend?

Y'all know I love the kardashians. Like I'm kinda obsessed with them. Well their show actually. Which is obviously Keeping Up With The Kardashians. Obviously. So I have been watching that show every week. And there's something I noticed. The kardashians wear red lips very often! So I looked it up and found some pictures. Just a heads up: pictures are from google, and I do not know whether these pictures might be from your site! So if you happen to come across one picture of yours, let me know! 

 See that! Especially Kourtney! Lately Kourtney has been wearing really pretty make-up looks in the show! The Kardashians are definitely addicted.


But not only the kardashians, this is a fall trend. Red lips are definite must this fall! Like I love this and so does the runway! FALL TREND it is! 

Strong lyrics that will lighten your mood!

Demi has gone through quite a bit. And when I heard this song it was like she was reading my mind. This song explains how everyone feels once in a while. And how thousands of people feel everyday. Just listen to the song. you'll be blown away. I'm pretty sure you've heard of it though !

Skies are crying
I am watching
Catching teardrops in my hands
Only silence as it's ending, like we never had a chance
Do you have to, make me feel like there is nothing left of me?

You can take everything I have
You can break everything I am
Like i'm made of glass
Like i'm made of paper
Go on and try to tear me down
I will be rising from the ground
Like a skyscraper!
Like a skyscraper!

As the smoke clears
I awaken, and untangle you from me
Would it make you, feel better to watch me while I bleed?
All my windows, still are broken
But I'm standing on my feet

You can take everything I have
You can break everything I am
Like I'm made of glass
Like I'm made of paper
Go on and try to tear me down
I will be rising from the ground
Like a skyscraper!
Like a skyscraper!

Go run, run, run
I'm gonna stay right here
Watch you disappear, yeah
Go run, run, run
Yeah it's a long way down
But I am closer to the clouds up here

You can take everything I have
You can break everything I am
Like I'm made of glass
Like I'm made of paper, Oh
Go on and try to tear me down
I will be rising from the ground

Like a skyscraper!
Like a skyscraper!

Like a skyscraper!
Like a skyscraper!